Why America Shouldn’t Participate in Eurovision (A Series)

First off, this is not going to be a series. I lied. I’m sorry. Not really. This doesn’t need to be a seri. The reasons are clear. My position has not changed, but as an American Eurovision fan, the question is constantly thrown my way.

Introduction

I’ve been aware of the Eurovision Song Contest since 2006 when Lordi won. YES! The epic show in Greece all those years ago made headlines in the United States. A few of my friends and I were really into the contest and while they “grew out of it,” I grew closer to this amazing Song Contest.

My love for the contest truly blossomed when I was able to watch the 2010 Eurovision Song Contest in Norway LIVE. I was hooked. I loved Lena. I loved Satellite. As an aspiring singer, at the time, who just finished up working for Carnival Cruise Lines as a production singer watching all the acts with their individual songs and staging was inspiring.

I thought to myself…

Man I wish we had that…

The Reality

If you read my previous blog, “Americans don’t deserve Eurovision,” I said:

When you’re trying to “Make American Great Again,” you don’t deserve the Eurovision Song Contest.

I stand by that statement.

The political mess of America aside, the tension in our country is palatable. As optimistic as I’d like to be, the reality is that a competition like Eurovision in America would likely stoke more feelings of insecurity and point blank highlight how un-united we are as a United States. On the other hand, the diversity in the music we are able to experience at the Eurovision Song Contest might not actually happen with an American-centric Eurovision.

Also, as a former “American Idol” fan I feel confident in the fact that we would vote wrong. EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR. Yes, there have been some disputed Eurovision winners but it isn’t a long-lasting pattern from my perspective. As an American, I am, unfortunately, “ye of little faith,” when it comes to our collective musical tastes. See: Post Malone. Insert: #Eyeroll

Selecting a representative to send to Eurovision…

So let’s say that a Worldvision situation happened where any country could essentially get in on the Eurovision magic. In America, our musical stylings vary and our diversity as a united nation is unparalleled (I think). However, the mess that could ensue upon us trying to figure out who our representative could be would exhaust me and you all… I’m sure. Ultimately, we may not end up sending our best. aka my worst nightmare.

Achieving glory…

While many of you would think that we’d come marching into the contest with top-notch production and stellar staging, my antennas are raised. Even if we did come with heat… our political missteps of the past and, unfortunately, the present could block us from overall appeal aka televotes. I get it. I’m not naive, politics is always present.

The Hope

I think it’d be great to have some sort of battle of the regions or states.  That would be something I’d watch, but as a Washington D.C.  native I can’t help but be selfishly concerned that we’d likely get no REAL representation… just like in the government. INSERT: small violin. LINK: DC statehood pitch

#RealTalk, I’d just like us to get some proper broadcasting of the Song Contest. I don’t see why we don’t get the semi-finals. Dear LogoTV, can we start showing the semis? OR are reruns of the Golden Girls just getting too high of ratings… They probably are. I’m a Blanche. Which Golden Girl are you?

In Closing: The Main Points

• America isn’t in Europe.
  • Yes, I know there are non-European countries in Eurovision, but we’re Americans. We had a whole tea party and war to fight for our “freedom,” from our Brittish “oppressors.” We are an independent nation and should act like it and stay on this side of the Atlantic.
• The Eurovision Song Contest is a distinctly European tradition.
  • The legit platform and premise for why the contest was created had nothing to do with America. NOTHING.
• We have terrible taste.
  • Sure, we have a lot of talent but a quick glance at the Billboard charts doesn’t always feature it.
• You don’t need us.
  • I know what you’re thinking, “Oh Alesia! I love your YouTube channel.” Yes. Yes. I know your Eurovision season isn’t complete without watching me watch your amazing Song Contest. But in all seriousness, what would be the point of American participating in the Song Contest? Just another country competing? That’s not a good enough reason in my book.
• Can all European nations compete first?
  • Until every country in Europe can compete every. single. year. at Eurovision, we shouldn’t be looking for outsiders to join. OR How about the countries outside who want to participate assist the other countries creatively and/or monetarily, first? When those countries hit a groove and are “on their feet,” then maybe then a non-European country could join.

Epilogue

All in all, I love being a fly on the wall observing, commenting and experiencing this amazing show. I admire the participants. I envy the contestants. Trust me, even when I am not a fan of an entry, I think these brave individuals have the opportunity of a LIFETIME and it’s a special European treat. A treat I am happy you decided to share with lil ol’me.

These are just a few simple thoughts on why America shouldn’t participate in the Eurovision Song Contest. I’m sure you have your own.